no MEN is this world

Real MEN are a a rarity nowadays. i say MEN in the context of what MEN ought to be: honorable, responsible... human in the sense that they should at least reciprocate what women give, and are still willing to offer, them.

Here are the only people i considered MAN enough to deserve being called as such:

1. MY GRANDFATHER. He's the "wise man", the "man of honor" in our family... the epitome of all things honorable and manly. i used to look up to him because despite his frequent seriousness, wherein his eyebrows would just knot in concentration and silence, his few words brim with wisdom. before, i look up at him in awe since he's the presence that keeps our family together and sane.

2. MY LAWYER UNCLE. He is success personified. Although he just has a so-so kind of living when one looks at the financial aspect, he's got quite a sum that's better left unmentioned. Working as one of Cojuangco's corporate lawyers in Bacolod, he's more used to living simply amongst ordinary people. his house is open to sugarcane farmers who seek his legal--even financial-- help. With all the inteligence, money, and charity, he's so really "down the right path" (if you know what i mean).

3. MY FATHER. He's the somewhat modern version of my gramps. he's so humble with what he's got although his kindness and sincerity, his sense of responsibility and wisdom, just shows through. unlike my loud and materialistically inclined mother, my father is the silent, hardworking ant in the family. he won't complain with anything. he even inspired me to just persevere and ignore people who don't even know better than to hinder and discourage me in any way.

4. DALE. Since the first time i met him until i gradually got to know him better than most, i found out he's one of the rarest of species called men... REAL men. This is especially true today, after all that has happened to him. what he is now is the product of what he had been through; which isn't something to hope for one's self. It hasn't been easy. But hell, look at him now (literally and otherwise). He survived to blossom into a better person.

But then...

1. Around three years ago, our whole family has just found out that lolo has another kid with another woman. at that time, the 'kid' was 34-36 years old. after all those years... i felt betrayed. lola had been the best lola any lola could be. she was such a petite old lady who have done nothing wrong (at least, as far as she's aware) to deserve the deception,

2. More than a year ago, i found out that my tito has been sleeping with his wife's stepsister. arghh...!

3. Just around two weeks ago, i found the confirmation about this hanging issue: is my father keeping a mistress??? that issue emerged when i gradually picked up bits and pieces that led me to such a thought. first, he bagan being obviously wary of people browsing through his celphone. then , he hides it just so we wouldn't use it without asking for permission.then, he stopped showing his salary and bank account. he come's home from places and events that seemed like alibis.

...and i thought they were principled and all, as if they were kissed by God full on the lips.

Being myself, i rarely like men for being men. maybe i'd just like men for the abs, the biceps, the pysique... that's all.

now, there's only one man i consider man enough to be in my life and to spend my time and efforts with: number 4.

but whether he'd stay to be man enough for me remains subject to Time's test.